If we’re going to be BFFs, you should know that I really suck at setting goals.
I’m working through a course right now for my photography business, and I’m stuck on week 1, lesson 1. What is tripping me up? All of the questions are about setting goals. What goals do you want for your business? What goals do you want for your family? What goals do you want for your life?
Uhm, I guess that filling in all the blanks with, “To be happy!” is NOT an acceptable response.
I’ve been pretty successful in my life and my photography business for the past 6+ years. I am happy with it, it has been profitable. I am mostly happy in my personal life. Perfect? No. But happy. I just suck at formally setting goals.
Back in 2010 when I met MeRa Koh, she asked me what I wanted to be doing in 10 years. I stared at her with a blank look. Uhhh… still living? Fortunately she then flipped the question over and asked what I did NOT want to be doing in 5 years, and *bam!* immediate answer. I can tell you what I don’t want to do right away.
Part of it is the fact that I’ve been a part of this internet world for too long. Time passes at breakneck speed. Where will things even be in 5 years? Who knows?!
If I dig deeper though, I know exactly where it started. I was in a relationship for 8 years that was tumultuous. I’d make plans on Wednesday for Friday, and they would fall through. I don’t deal well with plans being changed, so I stopped making plans — but even worse? I stopped setting goals.
I’m working on changing this — I believe goals are quite important. How can I know how I’m going to get to where I want to go if I don’t have goals?
So for this Things You Should Know About Me Thursday, I’m coming clean. I suck at setting goals, but I’m trying to learn how to do it. I think it will make me a better person.
Things You Should Know Thursdays was inspired by a Vivid & Brave journaling prompt. Our goal with the Vivid & Brave program is to help creative women dig deeper and find their authentic voice — this is mine. If you share a thing I should know about you, be sure to come back here and leave a comment so I can link to you too! The hashtag for social media is #TYSKT.
9 replies on “Ok, I’ll Admit It – I Suck at Setting Goals…”
Brainstorm:
I’m thinking “have a goal bowl”. Big fishbowl on your counter. Lots of slips of paper next to it. Colorful. Fun. Easy. Every time you think of a ‘goal’….toss it in the bowl. Do this for a while.
Then one day, you get a big poster board. Stick it on your wall. Start pulling ‘goal ideas’ out of the bowl. Instinctively stick them on the board….higher or lower according to what feels right at the moment.
Maybe some goals don’t even make it to the board. Maybe what you have now is a bit of a roadmap. Some themes, some ideas, some clusters.
Tanya Malott that is both brilliant and a potential disaster for me — I’m pretty full of ideas, as you know! Haha! For the moment, I need to focus on setting goals for the things I’m already committed to – Vivid & Brave, my boudoir clients, and family life. But I can see this working for coming up with dreams of things to do to keep us from being in a funk, sort of like a LifeList for … well, for our life! 😉
I’m in the same boat. Maybe if I try this, it will help me get ideas out of my head and into a more concrete place. The visual aspect is very appealing to me. Then as I see the ideas again after time, I can just trust that my intuition will put them in the right place.
Right now I have dozens of notebooks of ideas….and then they just sort of vanish, never to be seen again. This idea makes me feel more like the stronger ideas/goals can percolate to the top….
I’m thinking I want round pieces of paper…like bubbles.
Oh, and here’s my other plan for goal setting: http://www.daniellelaporte.com/creativity-art-design-articles/eight-years-work-looks-like-new-desire-map-cover-reveal/
Her basic question: “How do you want to FEEL?” A brilliant, and hard question to answer. I think a better place to start than “What do you want to do?”
@christinebpc I suggest Write It Down, Make It Happen by Henriette Anne Klauser. Or Goal Sisters by Ann Leach and Michelle Beaulieu.
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My advice: start with a very small and specific goal. Something you can’t possibly not achieve. Include some sort of small reward: a sticker, a new pen, a check mark–whatever floats your boat. Then do it again. Build from there. It’s addictive — achieving goal after goal.
Sydney Markle I’ve mastered the small, achievable goals. It is the big goal planning I struggle with — my business goals for five years, that sort of thing. I don’t like making a roadmap of where I’m going, but looking back I wonder how much it would help me.
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