Year: 2004

Oops! Here I go and post a restricted access post, and then I come home and go straight to bed two nights in a row! I was so exhausted last night when I got home – there was just no way I could fight off the sleep monster long enough to go through and grant access. Tonight. I promise.

On a separate note, do you realize how expensive weddings are? Oh my God. I had no clue. You start to feel like you are placing a dollar sign on everyone’s head and figuring out what they are worth to you. I’m really trying not to freak out. I promise, I am. Not sure how well I’m doing though…

I’ve been married before. Not for long, and things didn’t end well. If I was the person I am today back then, I’m sure it all would have played out differently. (I wouldn’t have ever had a wedding to begin with.)

Being a divorced woman with a child, I’ve always said that if I ever get remarried, I would want a small simple wedding. Not 3 minutes in a courthouse, but just something really simple. No idea what, but nothing to froo-froo. Matter of fact, after Mike went to his best friend Chris’ wedding over Labor Day weekend in New York, we discussed wedding size and I realized we might have issues when he said he had to have a best man and at least 3 groomsmen. 4 attendants is not a small wedding.

So, what the hell happened in the past 3 days?

Yesterday, I went in to Waldenbooks to buy my annual half-price calendar (I always wait until January 2nd to buy them, sometimes even later so they are only $5.) While standing at the calendars, I turned and noticed the wedding planning book section. I was immediately sucked over there, drawn by their magnetic force. I wanted to buy one. No, scratch that – I wanted to buy three or four. I had been engaged for all of about 40 hours, and I was ready to start shelling out money for wedding planning books. Me. The one who always said a simple wedding is appropriate for a second time bride.

I left the bookstore without the books, but I haven’t stopped thinking about it. Where would we have a ceremony? Outdoors? Indoors? Downtown? Galleria? Museum District? The rehearsal dinner? A bridesmaid luncheon? What style of dress will I wear? What domain name should we use for our wedding website? All these thoughts are running through my head, almost non-stop.

Last night, Kymberlie & I tried to go to the museum but the exhibit was almost sold out and too crowded to enjoy. Then we went out to eat, and talking was good for me because it took my mind off of my own rambling thoughts. But as I was heading for home – I had to stop. I couldn’t take it any more. I called Mike and told him that I simply had to give in to the guilty pleasure that I’m allowed now.

I went and bought bridal magazines.

Let me tell you, there is nothing more delightful then spending a Saturday morning, sitting on your bed in your jammies, flipping pages of a bridal magazine. The cakes. The dresses. The photographs.

I really don’t want it all, I still want to keep things relatively simple, but I do want more then I originally imagined. I was worried at first about that – is it wrong as a second-time bride? However, I felt much better after reading through Emily Post’s Tips for Second Weddings. A marriage is something to celebrate – and that’s exactly what I want to do. I want a party where we can celebrate with our friends. I realized it’s ok to have the froo-froo dress if I want. We should have 100 guests if we want to celebrate with us. It’s a big day, and in my opinion the best part is celebrating the occassion with your friends and family.

The best advice I’ve seen so far? Again from the second wedding tip site:

“There is one very important fact to keep in mind when you are planning your second wedding, it is your wedding and you should do the things that will please you the most. The “rules of etiquette” are simply there as a guide. Remember this marriage is as important as a “first” marriage and it deserves the same excitement and joy!”

Now I just need to figure out which one of the wedding planner books is the best … any suggestions?

Originally I had planned on replacing the blurry photo that is below, but I’ve sort of grown attached to it now so I just can’t do it. Instead, I’ll just post more photos! Great trade-off, right?

I also planned on posting the “rest of the story” last night, but there just wasn’t enough time. I still wanted to record it for posterity though, so here it goes…

Wednesday, New Year’s Eve, I had to work for a half day. I had a doctor’s appointment scheduled (no more tonsillitis! Yeah!) and lunch plans with Ash. Afterwards, I went to Foley’s to do some last minute shopping for shoes to wear to the New Year’s Eve parties we were going to later. Mike seemed a little frazzled when I said I was on my way home after that, but then said that it was ok. He told me that we would have to leave a little early for our dinner reservations at Josephine’s because he had promised to take Jason to Kaveh Kanes for hot chocolate. “What?!? If he wants hot chocolate like he had at Starbucks, just take him there now! I don’t want to leave early to go to Kaveh Kanes!” He really insisted that we had to go there because that was what he had promised, so I finally agreed.

I headed for home, got ready to go out, and two hours later I was heading back for downtown. Nothing like going in circles, is there? Traffic was a lot worse than we had anticipated, so we got in to downtown just in time for our dinner reservation. However, Mike was still heading for Kaveh Kanes. I was bewildered.

We arrived and he went to the counter to get hot chocolate for Jason and coffee for himself. Then he returned to the table with the drinks.

He turned to me and said how Kaveh Kanes was where we first met and how even at that very first meeting he had felt like he had always known me, and how we have always felt like old friends. He went on to say that he wanted to start the New Year’s off the same way he wanted to start all the other years off – with me. The best way to do that was to ask me to marry him – and then he went down on one knee, pulled out the box with the ring inside, told me that he loved me and asked me to marry him.

After a moment of stunned silence (and a quip about how I had to think about it), I said yes.

He went back to the counter and Greg handed him the four dozen roses that Jason & Mike had “stashed” there earlier in the day. It turns out that Jason was in on Mike’s “behind the scenes” planning and had kept it all a big secret. Afterwards, we headed off to Josephine’s for dinner, where they had a lovely table reserved for us – decorated with rose petals that Mike had brought by earlier in the day in the shape of a heart on the white table cloth with a huge candle in the center. We eat there often and it’s a small family-owned restaurant, so they were more than happy to coordinate with Mike, hold our table, and the owner even made a point of coming by to see the ring and congratulate us both. After that, it was off to the New Year’s Eve parties, calling friends along the way to share the big news.

I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect evening, and every New Year’s Eve we will celebrate the special day all over again!

It’s a whole new year. With a new year comes new changes. Mike asked the big question last night on New Year’s Eve. I said yes. Then after a nice dinner, we got to share the news with our friends at Michael & Ginger’s party and Kenny & Elaine’s respective parties. I can’t think of a better way to start off 2004!

More details later, and I’ll replace that blurry picture with a better one tonight. For now we’re in downtown checking out the new Light Rail and enjoying some time at Kaveh Kane’s.

Happy New Year! Good-bye 2003!