Now Macromedia can play with the big kids. This should be interesting to watch.
I had a horrible migraine yesterday. I thought I was going to get another one today – ugh. I hate it when I get migraines. Fortunately, I caught the one today just in time, took some Excedrin and snapped out of it. Big sigh of relief.
Now here’s a thought… you know how sometimes you feel like you are the only one that has feelings that you don’t belong, that you are really 20-something trapped in an older body? You know – like maybe you don’t fit in with a group of people, coworkers or a group of friends, you feel uncomfortable. For different people it is in different situations, and some people deal with it a lot better then others. Now, what’s the point to this rambling? I don’t know. I just realized it last night when I talked to Tom and then it hit me today again when Naomi & I were talking. You see, if you haven’t already guessed it, I am “quirky”. And I am proud of it. I was feeling very quirky today – probably the migraine haze. Then Naomi starts to tell me that I never knew about her – which I think make her a very fascinating person. Does she think she is fascinating? NO. She came back with the fact that she isn’t living up to the “American Dream” – no husband, no kids, no fantastic amazing career. (FYI – I think her design work is fantastic!) Ok, here we go (with slight edits to spare the innocent):
.:Me: You have learned a lot, experienced a lot, and just because you are not conforming to what our *freaky* screwed up society considers “normal” does NOT make you a “washup”.
.:Her: yeah but in a practical sense… nothing to show for the time i spent… no degree (despite being close after 4 years of
school), no kids, lots of debt, don’t own anything of value, no investments…
.:Her: it’s not that i don’t place value in what i’ve done, but most other people and society do not. I wouldn’t trade a lot of my experiences, but at the same time i feel weird trying to fit in with other people my age, esp. in a “professional” environment.
.:Me: Well, me too. I think THAT is actually normal.
.:Me: I got married and divorced by the time I was 23. I had a kid under strained circumstances. I am a young single mom. So I don’t fit in w/ the “happy married couples” and I don’t fit in w/ the single people. (note: I don’t have a degree either, other then my 2 year program at Texas A&M where I majored in Aggie tradition and minored in the Dixie Chicken! You don’t get a piece of paper to frame for that, although I have considered printing my own special one for that program)
.:Her: no wonder we get along so well 🙂
.:Me: And I suspect that a lot of those happy normal married people have issues too – they just hide it well.
.:Her: *nod* i suspect you’re right
.:Me: Heck, I hide it well.
.:Me: Tom & I talked last night about how we feel like we have to live up to society’s expectations, even if it isn’t what we want to do.
I am sure you get the point. Then I went on to *prove* how little I fit in. I am 31, planning on going out to a “pub” here in Houston in the hip and cool part of town. Ummm… I have no clue what to wear! How is that for sad? I feel so ancient some days. But on the other hand, why do I have to feel so old? Why on earth can’t I just be my age – which is rather young if you ask me. Well, I have been through a lot in the past 10 years, not to mention that for 7.5 of those years I dated someone 14 years
Speaking of Naomi, she always finds the most interesting websites. Everyone should order these for their car. Definately a touch of class! Ok, ok, they are incredibly tacky, and in all honesty all I can see is some redneck driving around with them on their big truck with the gun rack in the back window. (Not something that Naomi or I would ever put on our beautiful vehicles!)
