Amuse Me

So You Want to Know?

Men often complain that women never tell them what they want when it comes to sex, which I personally don’t agree with. Most women, if they are wise, will either tell you or guide you. Watch for the context clues, because you can bet they are there. Meanwhile, you can always study this list to see where you are missing the mark. Or if the man in your life is missing the hints, maybe you should print this out and leave it somewhere for him?

However, please do not follow the advice on #5. If you ask her over and over if you have found it, she might just slap you. And you probably deserve it. When you find it, you will know. On the other hand, the advice on #3 (and lots of the others) is really, really good. It’s the little things that often mean the most. Thanks, now get your tongue out of my ear. [via Ryland]

Oh, and by the way – before anyone asks, I didn’t post this list because of any negative personal experiences I have had in my past. It was actually Ryland’s take on it that cracked me up. That said, anything that didn’t make the list that should have? Or that you think you have even better advice for?

By Christine

Christine is an Avenger of Sexiness. Her Superpower is helping Hot Mamas grow their Confidence by rediscovering their Beauty. She lives in the Heights in Houston, Texas, works as a boudoir photographer, and writes about running a Business of Awesome. In her spare time, she loves to knit, especially when she travels. She & her husband Mike have a food blog at Spoon & Knife.

10 replies on “So You Want to Know?”

Speaking as a man, that is a very good list. I have to think that couples who have been together for a while will find these things out. I am doing pretty well based on the list.

More men should read that.

“Oh Dear Lord, no. Matt! Don’t look!”
BTW, I think this has got to be one of the more interesting endings to a post I’ve read in a while. Sassy and sarcastic :).

But guys really know all you need is a good pickup line:
“Got any raisins? No? How about a date?”

Matt, I honestly thought your eyes were going to burn right there in your skull. Be careful, it can be bad out there.

And no, Ryland … that isn’t it either. Although it does feel good when you do it like that.

Hmmmm. Better advice? Something often complained about among girlfriends during college:

When guys automatically assume because rubbing something lightly and gently feels good, that applying force 20x as strong and fast will somehow feel ‘better’. It…just doesn’t.

OH! That reminds me… how about when the guy assumes that because intercourse at the speed of light (aka “Bunny Sex” but not in the “Bunny Does it Better” kind of way at all) is a good thing? Thanks, but slow and easy is much better – and a lot less painful too!

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