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BlahBlahBabble Educate Me

Must Break Through…

Mary Allen College in Crockett Texas

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As I went to bed last night I was angry with myself. I started this site over, fresh and new, so it wouldn’t feel like and empty shell any more. A clean slate. A new start.

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Yet what I wrote yesterday didn’t feel like my voice. It didn’t feel authentically me. If you & I were talking, I wouldn’t sound like that.

It pisses me off.

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That anger is a good thing though, because I’m going to keep it in mind as I write, or at least I’ll try. If I wouldn’t say it out loud, then I’ll think about how I would.

I want my posts to feel like a letter. A note from me to you. A journal for myself. Personal.

Practice, practice, practice. Now that I’m aware of it, I can deal with it.

No more being pissed off at my writing. When it feels like crap, I just need to break through and continue.

Photograph taken on a recent Texas road trip. The former Mary Allen College in Crockett, Texas.

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Educate Me

Right, Sure it Does…

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Mike found this this morning and asked if this summed up the last two weeks of my Trig class. It does, so perfectly. I swear, they are just making that stuff up.

Imaginary Numbers

From xkcd.

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Birthday Wishes Educate Me

It’s Over!

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Wheeee! Fall 2006 semester is officially behind me! My Trig final yesterday was supposed to be from 12:30 – 2:20. I finished at 5:00. Yes, over 4 hours on a Trig final. However, I think I did pretty well – I won’t get the A in the class that I originally wanted because I never could remember some of the formulas in the middle of the course (double angle identities, half angle identities), but I should come out with a B. Considering I have thought for over 20 years that I am terrible at math and I never took Trig in high school, I did really well. If the third test had not kicked my butt like it did, I probably could have had that A. (I had a 94, then a 99, and then a *gasp* 57. Thank goodness for the 20 points worth of test corrections I did over the semester!)

Thanks to studying so hard for the test, I totally forgot to wish Elaine a happy birthday on Wednesday. I didn’t forget her birthday – it is the day before my Mom’s, which was yesterday (Happy Birthday shout-out to Mom!), but I forgot to call. Or e-mail, since this is the first time I’ve been on the computer since my last post. Eeep! I hopefully have rectified the situation with sufficient groveling to make up for it, and we will be at her birthday party on Saturday to celebrate in person.

Now I just have to figure out what I’m taking next semester, and decide if it is time to transfer to a 4-year college next fall or the following spring. I hate to pay the higher tuition, so I’m trying to stay at the junior college level for as long as possible!

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BlahBlahBabble Educate Me Knittastic!

Yarn’s Bound and Wound…

Kid & Ewe & Knitters TooRandomness to wrap up October.

Stalker Angie has come up with the Kid & Ewe festival theme song, Yarn’s Bound and Wound:

Yarn’s bound and wound, we’re loadin’ up and truckin’,
We gonna drive past San Antonio.
We’ve got a long way to go, and a short time to get there.
We’re West bound just watch ol’ Stalker run.

That is just a taste of it. Read her site for more. Kid & Ewe countdown begins! Will YOU be joining us? EVERYONE is welcome – whether you have a blog or not! Get the details here. November 11th – be there!

The giant paper (17 pages with citations) that I wrote two weeks ago on how to become a pharmacist? I made a 100, including the presentation. I also learned that one can not go to pharmacy school part time as I dreamed, and it might just have to wait until after 2010 when Jason graduates from high school. I’m looking at several other degree options, including Chemistry, Biochemistry, Psychology, Communications with a focus in Advertising, and Photography. All have their pros and cons, so I have some thinking to do.

The Trig test that I took just days after turning in that paper? I did not do so well. We will just focus on the fact that I had a 95 and a 99 for the first two tests and the fact that our final can replace our lowest grade. It will be all good.

If I don’t get a Chemistry degree, I can stop taking all of these math and science classes. It would make my life easier in some ways, but I think I would miss the challenge. Decisions, decisions. Really? I just want to take pretty photographs.

I had more teen trick-or-treaters tonight than kid trick-or-treaters. It was really odd, and a bit disappointing. I like to see the little kids all dresses up. The high school freshman with “I am a Gangster” written on a plain white t-shirt? Yeah, not so much. I made him do gang signs for me though, so that redeemed it somewhat for me.

I called Katy Blogless earlier to work out a deal with her – I am going to trade her chocolate Halloween candy for the fruity stuff. I like things like red Twizzlers, Smarties, and cherry Tootsie Roll pops. She likes chocolate. It all works out well. Jason was sweet and gave me Smarties tonight – he knows how to win his mom over.

Don’t tell my family, but I have hidden a bag of Reese’s Miniatures that I got on sale. I do like some chocolate, especially when there is peanut butter involved. Yum.

I’m actually not a big sweet eater. So just a few pieces of candy will do until next Halloween.

I am going to photograph Katy’s finished knitting tomorrow, so there will be a proxy post here for her. Whee!

Speaking of knitting, I realized that it might be too warm for a sweater at Kid & Ewe. I cast on today for the Forest Canopy Shawl using the most beautiful skein of Anne yarn. I am so excited about knitting this lace!

I have started work on the calendars. Would anyone be interested in a “design your own” calendar where you get to pick the 12 photos you want to be included? Just tossing out ideas.

I hate Daylight Saving Time. I know, I know, we “gained an hour” this past weekend. The only thing it did for me was jack with my sleeping patterns and I have been exhausted all day today. Then again, I have been up for 17+ hours, so maybe that is why I am tired? I need to go to bed, but I need to make sure I talk to Mike before he starts his return adventure to Houston, so I need to stay up for a little while. I have no idea where I am supposed to find him when I get to the airport tomorrow night to pick him up.

Mike comes home tomorrow. He will go from London to Amsterdam and then home to Houston. I’m glad he will finally be home. Maybe I can get some sleep finally.

That wraps up October. Happy November, everyone! Rabbit, Rabbit!

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Educate Me

I Give Up.

I made the decision last night, and it is final – but I’m not entirely happy about it. I decided that I need to drop Organic Chemistry. I should have done it at the very beginning, as I could tell right away that there would be problems. When I registered, Prof. A was supposed to be my instructor. I had researched Prof. A, I knew how Prof. A lectured, I was set. It was going to be a tough class, but good. I could do it.

Then I walked in on the first day and discovered that I had a replacement prof, Prof. Z. Prof. Z does not normally teach at my school, although he does teach Org. Chem at a private institution here in Houston. He is a nice guy, but his lectures are scattered. There are only so many times in one lecture that you can say, “Oh, wait, never mind – you don’t need to know that” or “Oh, wait, that’s not right.” Uh, great. It is a hard enough subject, but when someone keeps shifting directions on you – it is terrible.

I tried to take Trig online last year, and I learned then that I need a lecture to learn. I am too auditory to teach it to myself by reading alone. I have discovered now that I need a good lecture to learn. I can still quote things I learned in Chem. I over a year ago, but this class? I’m so lost. Beyond lost. Terribly lost.

Mike ended up getting a phone call from me last night with me ready to go off the deep end. I could NOT figure out the material. Reading the book was like reading a textbook I had found and just randomly opened up to the middle of the book. I felt lost. I felt frustated.

I can not take it anymore.

There is enough going on in my life with my family. I do not have 5 hours a day to devote to relearning the parts where I am weak in this course. Unfortunately, I got lost back at memorizing the initial functional groups. They are too important. I can not do it.

I’m even more frustrated because I actually *get* the concepts. I understand why things work the way that they do. Just don’t ask me to draw a ketone for you.

Prof. A will be teaching it again in the spring. It wasn’t his fault that they had him take over a different class and gave mine away. So I’m going to drop this one, and take it again. I’m scared that it will look bad to have two classes that I have withdrawn from on my transcripts, but overall it has to look better than taking a C or even a D in the class. My GPA simply can not handle that hit. In addition, I can’t imagine coming out of Org. Chem I with that weak of a grade and doing well in Org. Chem II.

I hate giving up. But my family has to come first, and I have reached my breaking point. I need to be able to focus on Jason and helping him through his rough patch at school. I can’t do any more than what I am doing at this moment. Hopefully, round two will go better. I’m still bitter about the whole thing though.

As for the Trig class that I dropped last spring? I currently have a 99 in the class. I rock the Trig. Who knew? Here I always thought I sucked at math!