What is up with people and their lack of elevator etiquette? This has been bothering me for the past few days. I work in a building with 46 floors. We have three sets of elevators, divided in to banks so that things run smoothly. My bank of elevators covers 32 – 46. I work on 34, the third stop. There is rarely anyone else on the elevator that is going to get off before I do, so I position myself accordingly. If I was getting off last, I would go straight to the back of the elevator – but I’m not. I know I am going to be getting off first, so I slide in, press my button, and position myself along the wall. Not right in front of the panel, but not too far back – I want to slide off quickly when we get to my floor. So what is it with people that insist on wedging themselves inbetween me and the buttons? Especially when they are getting off on 45? Hello? The wedge is rude to begin with when there is room to stand somewhere else, but you’re blocking my quick exit! Plus they normally block my view of the Captivate screens. I have to have my view of the Captivate monitors so I can get the latest news! (Seriously, somedays I would be oblivious to world events without those screens in the elevator. How do people live without them?)
Also on the etiquette radar lately – is it wrong to use Evite to send out “Save the Date” announcements for the wedding? How about using The Honeymoon to register for a honeymoon as your gift? How many places should you register? What is the max? 3? (Does Amazon.com count?) Decisions, decisions…
I should note that I’ve been busy making lots of decisions lately, that’s why I’ve been so quiet. More wedding news and house hunting news to come. First I have to worry about people trapping me in the elevator.
22 replies on “Elevator Etiquette…”
Wow! You have monitors in your elevators! That’s so cool! Where do work? The year 2020? *wink*
I think two places is enough to register your gifts. Make sure you don’t duplicate either. Make sure you include that in your invitation, too. I left that out in my invitation but through word of mouth, we got presents from where we registered.
I don’t think it is wrong to use those services. It is merely a sign of the times. We have other avenues through which to do old things. Good luck with all of your househunting/wedding planning you have to do. I know it is a lot.
hehe at work we have a number of double exit elevators ie. with doors on the front and back; so often when we enter them we turn to face the doors we have just entered, and being staff all the customers imitate us and face the same way. At the last second we turn to face the other doors and exit them when they open leaving the passengers slightly confused and feeling silly! Ha ha.
Ian 🙂
P.S. Yes I know I need to get a life!
We don’t formally register for our honeyman but I added a note in our invites that we were accepting monetary gifts towards our honeyman in lieu of gifts. No one seemed to be offended.
As for how many places? I’d say 2, 3 at the most (and yes, I think Amazon.com shouls count!). Also, I don’t think it would be appropriate to register for BOTH honeymon and gifts… I think you should stick with just one or the other…
Looking forward to hearing more about the house and wedding plans!
I’m old school. I’d say send out invites in the mail. I got a email in regards to being at a reception and showing up for family pictures. Don’t know if that’s really the same note, but dang did I think it was tacky!
wow – that thehoneymoon.com site is kinda a neat concept…
Oh – as for the save-the-date e-mail… I received one for a friend’s wedding months in advance. I was OK with that. With everyone’s hectic life, it helps to be able to know a few months before you get the actual paper invite, especially if you have guests traveling in for the wedding who need to make plans.
If you plan on purchasing a house, Keller Williams has a service where you can register and have people give monetary gifts to be used in the purchase of your first home.
I got a Save the Date postcard for an event once. They were very nice and it really got my attention. Would that be too expensive for you to do? They were seriously a postcard (large, but still). And I say register at 3 places max. Otherwise you’ll appear greedy.
“Save the date” emails are cool as long as that’s not the only invite you send. I’m sure you knew that, though. Send the email, people can plug the reminder right into their email when it arrives – most people appreciate the notice, especially during wedding “season”.
Yes, Amazon.com counts – general rule of thumb is two places for your registry but if you’re registering at a specialty store (like registering for your china at a store that only sells china, for example) then you can get away with three.
Also, one thing about Amazon wishlists is that you can *only* receive the stuff on your list, and *only* the stuff through Amazon. You know how sometimes people are selling the same item new, but for less? Your guests can’t buy those, even if they are brand-spanking new. If you’re registering at Amazon.com you may want to include a little note about how it works, along with your address and a notation that says something like, “If you can find a cheaper/similar item you’d like to send, please order it directly using this address.” People like the option of being able to save money and still get you something you really want.
Don’t sweat it about looking greedy, though – in my years of dealing with weddings there was only one time that anyone ever made a “Just who the hell does she think she is?!?” comment, and that was when a woman registered for a $500/per place setting set of china. You have to push wedding guests pretty damn far before they think you’re being greedy.
Whew – sorry I got all long-winded there, but you should have predicted I would when it comes to weddings. :^)
I would say go for the Honeymoon, with a note saying you can give cash towards it also, Amazon, and one place that isn’t online…in my family at least, I can think of at least three people who are internet helpless. You can also mention that you don’t expect something from all of the places, these are just the options.
I wouldn’t be offended by an evite Save the Date, either.
To specifically request money to be used toward a honeymoon or your first house is not socially correct. If people choose to just give you money that is fine…you can tell them what you used it for when you send a real thank you note. But don’t be so tacky to ask for it that way.
I actually wouldn’t send out a “we are registered here” note with the invitations because it sounds like we expect gifts. We don’t – the guest’s presence is present enough. I think I’m going to use Evite for the local friends (who I know are techno savvy) but probably use postcards for people out of town. I realize most of our friends in town we are telling in person the date, and we will send out invitations 8 weeks in advance, so that should work. I want to get a general wedding website up so that we can include the URL on the save the date notices – that way they know where to go to find info on times, hotels, etc. Since it is Memorial Day weekend, we have to block rooms in advance. Need to make sure they have somewhere to stay!
I lean towards Amazon or Target.com or Williams Sonoma online for people that have inquired about sending gifts from out of town. I still want to register at a department store and a “specialty” store. I guess either Williams Sonoma or Bed, Bath & Beyond would fit the bill there. I don’t think I would want to use the Honeymoon site – although it is a cool service, they charge a fee and I don’t like listing out the itinerary like they require. Just seems … wrong. Something like that.
To Jeannete – it is not “tacky” or “socially unacceptable” to ask for money. It is up to the bride and the groom to decide – it is their day after all and they know their friends best.
What *is* tacky is to put down in public the action someone else took. You don’t even know me and yes, I don’t appreciate your comment…
Sorry for the snippiness – that comment rubbed me the wrong way… I don’t think Jeanette meant it in any mean-sprited way but a girl doesn’t like to be told she was “tacky” in regards to her wedding day. Not cool, OK? None of my friends questioned it and I *did* ask around before I went through with it. Enough said… I’ll shut up now.
That’s true – people generally do know their friends best. Most people that know me know I’ve lived on my own for many years, so I probably don’t need a set of pots and pans. (But oh, how I want that Kitchenaid mixer… and I need a new 9×13 baking pan. And a good casserole.) On the other hand, cash is a great gift and would be gladly accepted – but I personally would want to give people options. Some people are really opposed to giving cash, and that’s ok. We need towels and other household items – there are plenty of things to register for out there!
When some of my friends were married, they also had the wedding website like y’all are planning on doing. Instead of listing where they were registered in the invitations & save the date cards, they listed the web site where guests could check out all kinds of things. Then, on the web site they put where they were registered, in addition to hotels, directions, etc…
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That was the same thing I was thinking of doing, Mandy. That way it’s just more subtle. Plus it’s easy to find when you can’t find the invitation itself!
i got a save the date that came on a refridgerator magnet. i thought that was a brilliant idea.
btw – it’s totally fine, expected and appreciated by most people if you put in a note about where you’re registered. It beats the hell out of two hundred people calling you and your parents and asking about it.
People know that gifts are expected and appreciated, they know that they’re not obligated, but if they are giving a gift, they would rather get one from a registry.
I live in Malaysia. Majority of people who stay in “not-so-urban” areas such as Klang, Selangor (where I stay by the way), people would rush into the elevator when the doors are opened without allowing the passengers in the lift to exit first!!! Yes! I witnessed this myself in Jaya Jusco, Klang. On the other hand, in urban areas such as Kuala Lumpur, the capital of Malaysia, it is rare to witness such incidences but believe me, there are still one or two recalcitrant that rushes into the lift. When it is pointed out to them that they should wait for the passengers in the lift to come out first, the recalcitrant would retaliate and you would be told off instead!
I strongly believe that “consideration” is the main keyword here. In Klang, it is not rare to find some joker smoking in an air-conditioned restaurant, cinema, etc. You will also be surprised to find inconsiderate drivers parking and driving their cars indiscriminately.
Perhaps a research on why people in Malaysia (especially this sub-urban areas) behave in such a disgusting manner should be conducted.